The Writer and the Wrench

If it seems as though I only write from a place of my failures, it’s because those are the times that I learn and grow the most, and believe me when I say I’m a work in progress. The moment I think I have something down, I’m reminded how much more I have to learn or how much deeper I so desperately need my roots to grow. So, here’s another chapter out of my life from just a few weeks ago. It all started with one of my administrators coming in for an observation during the last 10 minutes of my class. What did he see? Almost all of the…

One of my health goals this year is to hit my 40th birthday the healthiest I’ve been since I was a high school athlete.  I tend to exercise and eat right in cycles, but I’ve yet to find that stride that helps me keep going when I trip up.  Believe it or not, my biggest enemy is not a binge fest of highly McFatty foods and sweets. I know how to pick myself up and recover from that. It’s also not about missing a workout.  It’s the psychology behind missing two planned workouts in a week. I struggle with OCD tendencies when it comes to ordering. For instance, if I want…

If you want to know how the third list has been working out for me, it’s been great! Until this last week. It was the perfect storm of a sick child, my ever-growing school and home to do list, and my anxiety and depression that left me crying in the living room after fixing dinner a few nights ago. And not a casual mist. The ugly cry that requires a poncho. The one that comes with intrusive thoughts. The one that makes you feel like you’re in a black hole and will never get out. And sometimes you don’t want to get out. You just want it to go ahead…

When we moved into our current home ten years ago, it was always our plan to plant a Valencia orange tree. As a kid, my family juiced oranges every winter, and once you’ve had true fresh squeezed juice, store bought jugs just won’t do the trick anymore.  We initially put off purchasing a tree because of the expense. At the time, $100 just seemed too extravagant when we had so many other things to fix up around our new home. With the passage of time we rarely thought about our initial plan. Occasionally one of us would say, “Remember when we wanted to plant an orange tree? Do you still want to…

This post is not for the parents who have all their ducks in a row, dressed in uniform, and quacking in unison. This is for the parents who have minus seven things together, and they are already saving for their kids’ future therapy. I’ve always been super frustrated by parents who seem to have everything in balance: a clean house, manicured lawn, and apparently enough FREE TIME every other day to create special memories for their families. They are doing all the things! And I’m not jealous of the things. I’m jealous of how they seem to be professional jugglers. I’m jealous of the fact that I’m so zeroed in…

The ugly truth: more often than not, I put my career above my family. Not because I care more about my job (though my actions would say otherwise), but because it seems like I have a never-ending to-do list at work. Once I cross something off the list, three more items appear. I’m constantly treading the water of planning, emailing, managing, grading, followed by more planning, more emailing, more managing, and more grading. My metaphorical legs are rubber by the time I get home. What does my family get? The leftovers, and not the kind that makes you glad you ordered extra noodles with yum-yum sauce. To help me stay…

Three hundred sixty-five chances to get it “right.” Getting it right doesn’t mean that every day is going to be perfect. In fact, most days are riddled with exhaustion, frustration, and sometimes defeat. BUT GOD! His grace is sufficient for you. His power is made perfect in your WEAKNESS (II Corinthians 12:9) In other words, his empowerment is in you through the gift of the Holy Spirit. Engage that power. And what about those tough days, weeks, months, or seasons? You can still get it “right.” Choose HIM every day. Take one step at a time, make one healthy decision at a time, and when you falter, because you will, rely on…

I’m dying looking at the last few posts from my blog. The last one is from January of 2019 and the one before it, January 2018. If that doesn’t sum up the current season of my life, I don’t know what will. I start the year out strong, fall off the wagon mid-January, then resort to rolling down the hill into the dungeons of December. No matter how much time I take off, the smoldered passion for writing always flares up when a slight breeze of inspiration blows by. So, it wouldn’t be January Bev without talking about the upcoming year’s goals.  If you’ve been with me on this journey…

Oh, hey! If you want some New Year’s advice from someone who has all their shtuff together, go subscribe to someone else. Remember when I was going to write in my blog once a week? I’ve finally discovered that even though I am a writer, I’m not a blogger. In fact, you’re lucky you’re getting this post. But, I felt inspired, so here’s a little ditty served up just for you. This past year was one of the best and one of the most difficult seasons of my life. The blessings were abundant, but the personal challenges almost defeated me (ask my husband who had to deal with a wilted…

Last weekend, I found myself with one remaining remnant of the Christmas season hanging around the house like a guest you just can’t get rid of: the Christmas memory book. It’s one of those things you hate to fill out every year, but love to read the following December when you pull it out of the attic. So far, my family has seven Christmases catalogued with our family’s cards, traditions, meals, activities, special gifts, mishaps and so on. Desperately wanting to be done with it so I could officially declare Christmas over, I quickly scribbled answers into each of the blanks for “Christmas 2017.” The last section has several lines…